just little insights to me and my world

Mission accomplished


I DID IT!!! Mission accomplished!! Goal attained!! Success! Finally!
At the beginning of 2012 I decided that I was no longer going to be fat.. I wanted to get fit and be healthy for myself, my life, my daughter and my family. So I set a goal.. 40 pounds by my 40th birthday in September! I found out about the P.I.N.K method and decided that was for me (www.pinkmethod.com) I’m living proof that it works! Day 1 was January 9th(I remember that day very well) I gave up sodas, coffee, sugar and carbs! As I went through the PINK program I slowly added back the good carbs and added in exercise. The PINK program taught me how to eat healthy and expanded my palette to foods I never thought I would try let alone enjoy! Exercise become a part of my life. It become a habit for me to do something active daily and when I don’t I feel crappy. I enjoy the soreness I feel after exercising.. Makes me feel like I did my body good.
So day after day week after week I strived, pushed myself, challenged myself to become a healthy better me!
Now I am human and I did have times of not very healthy food choices but I made that decision to have my “cheat times” but to never give up!
And now here I am 23 weeks into my challenge and I have done it!! I stepped on the scale and was 40 lbs lighter!!!
12 weeks before my 40th and I am proud to say I DID IT!! I didn’t give up and kept pushing myself and running and trying new exercises and it has paid off!
Now what you ask??
I keep going! Being healthy and living fit is a lifestyle. It’s now my lifestyle my family’s way of living. I have a new goal of 20 pounds my the end of the year and will continue to push myself, challenge myself and strive for my goals.


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Weighing in

When I started my get fit 2012 my goal was 40 lbs by my 40th birthday! That was reasonable.. I had 35 weeks to lose 40 lbs. Well here it is 22 weeks until the big 4-0 and I am down 30 pounds! Yes you have heard me right.. 30!!! I am so proud of myself! This week has also become a great week because I finally got back in the water and swimming again! I was a swimmer in high school and haven’t done any kind of water workout in about 20 years.. It wasn’t a pretty sight Monday as I was struggling to get to the other end of the pool but I loved it and can’t wait for my endurance and strength to get better. I have really missed swimming!
My running is getter better(I guess) the fact I keep doing is an amazing feat in itself! I keep adding more and more activity to my life and I’m loving it!
I’ve become a fitness junkie almost.. I like looking at running shoes and workout gear and equipment!
The biggest thing for me is that I am a positive influence for my daughter.. She finally has eaten and likes broccoli and cauliflower! I am showing her how to live and eat healthy. Not only am I getting healthy for me but also to be around for her as she grows up.
I know it sounds cliche but it is a lifestyle change and not a diet.
And I couldn’t be happier!



I AM….


I AM a Warrior!!! I did it!! All 3.2 miles of running, wet, wall climbing, sliding, fire jumping, crawling through mud pit mess!

I am so proud of myself! I stood in front of that 15 foot wall with a rope and thought.. This is gonna be hard! Well.. It was. But I did it! And i was SO incredibly proud of myself.. I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face. I feel like if I can do that I can do anything. Not only was it a physical accomplishment but an emotional one as well.. I got over the wall of self disrespect. I now respect myself for who I am and what I have done. I am so much stronger than I ever thought I was.. Not only in muscle strength but mentally. These past couple of years with all the emotional/mental stress of everything from my personal health issues to my personal relationship issues.. I left all that on the other side of the wall.. I am on the other side now and am a stronger person.. A warrior!

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So here we are 4 days until the Warrior Dash.. And I’m nervous. Why I am nervous? It’s just a fun, get muddy hang put with friends kind of run.. No pressure kind of adventure. But I’m still nervous. At the beginning of the year I decided that I’m done with the way I was living.. I’m tired of being out of shape and unhealthy so I made changes in my life..I’m living a healthy lifestyle and I am loving it! So here’s where this muddy fun run fits in.. It’s a challenge for me to prove to myself that I can do this.. I can overcome hard challenges and become the fit warrior I’m meant to be. This is an emotional as well as physical challenge. It’s like getting over the emotional mountain of self pity, body hating, low self esteem.. It’s conquering the the wall of power and letting myself prove to nobody but myself that I am a power to be reckoned with, that I am overcoming these boundaries and will prevail over this fight against fat.. That I am a warrior!!


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A work in progress

So here we are in March! I’ve been doing P.I.N.K for 8 weeks now and I’m down 22 pounds and 8 inches off hips! Yay me! I am doing something active every day and now starting to run! Yes me.. Running.. And not for my life(well it is for my life because it will make me stronger and healthier and live longer)
And all I can say is I love it!!! Now I’m not going to lie.. I have slipped gone backwards a bit but the difference is I feel it.. I feel like crap after I do eat unhealthy and can’t wait to get it put d my system and get something good for me in there. I feel it when I don’t workout for a day or so.. I lose my motivation but then I go run or Zumba and feel better and miss that feeling of accomplishment after a great workout!
I have my first Warrior Dash coming up next weekend and I am nervous as hell but so excited at the same time! I hoping to make this 5k thing a habit. I want to keep doing 5k and start swimming again and who knows.. Maybe some more competitive stuff. I’m taking it one step at time.. But I’m still moving forward.


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A new me!


So it’s been almost a month since 2012 has started and my quest to get fit and healthy is well under way. I have lost almost 15 pounds and exercise daily. I have given up sodas and fast food and pretty much even all drinks except water. I’m trying foods(and liking them) I never thought I would(fish and different vegetables). I’m going to exercise classes.. In public!!
I am liking this new lifestyle.. Yes its a lifestyle and not a diet. Being close to the big 4-0 I needed to start taking care of myself-things start going down hill after 40 and I needed to start before I ended up on TLC for some overweight show.
So 3 weeks ago I was sitting at home watching The Doctors.. It was a show I recorded from November but finally for to watch(this show changed my life!)
The program was about a new program called The P.I.N.K. Method. I ordered it-some people questioned my choice in this program but I am determined and I will finish this and come out being a stronger, fitter, better me! Yes it is limiting in the food choices but I NEEDED this. I needed to learn how to eat healthy and make great food choices and how to exercise. I am learning so much on nutrition and how to take care of my body-for life not just to lose the weight. I also love the support I’m getting from my P.I.N.K friends on facebook! It’s such a great support system and in anything you do it’s great to have a support system that understands what you are going through.
So far 2012 is off to a great start! 13.6 pounds off, almost 6 inches off my waist and I’ve said goodbye to the 200s(for good!!) My goal is 40 pounds by my 40th birthday in September(ready to get my party on!)
2012-it’s going to be a fabulously fit year and a new me!

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No more excuses

“I don’t have time”, “I’m have too much to do”, ” it’s too hard”, “I just can’t”… All the excuses I’ve used over the years for not getting in shape, exercising and eating right. Well it’s 2012 and NO MORE EXCUSES!
I have finally burned it into my head that this is it-I WILL do it-I can and will get healthy! My obsession right now is all about getting there and what tools I need to be a success at fighting fat. This decision I have made has been a long time coming. I knew years ago I needed this-well actually years ago I was in the same boat and I did it! I lost the weight and was feeling good and looking great.. then I got pregnant and lazy. I’m not saying that pregnancy made me lazy because it’s now 4 years later and I’m still lazy. I have no excuses now. A huge part of what’s driving me is mental. I can say over and over “I’m fat, I need to lose weight” but until it is mentally burned in my brain that I am going to do it-I slack, slide and just get lazy.
So, what burned this in my head that I was ready.. My clothes getting bigger is the biggest motivator. I hate that I hate shopping for clothes. To me it’s the worst chore ever and I always end up buying stuff for my daughter because I can always find stuff for her to wear. The other engraver was my daughter herself. I want to be able to take her places, do things and being bigger doesn’t make it easy to do things physically. So it’s now there-burned in my brain that this is it-NO MORE EXCUSES!
When battling fat I have to have goals to strive for and my short term goal is 10 pounds down by February and my ultimate goal is 40 pounds by my 40th birthday in September(which is 36 weeks away!) I CAN AND WILL do this!! It’s burned in my brain!
So 2012 better watch out because it’s gonna see a healthier, skinner, fitter and happier me! NO EXCUSE!!


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The 39th year.

39…it’s just a number right? According to Wikipedia its  the sum of five consecutive primes (3 + 5 + 7 + 11 + 13) and the sum of the first three powers of 3 (31 + 32 + 33).  “39” is a song by The Cure on their album “Bloodflowers”   and  The retired jersey number of former baseball player Roy Campanella.  But more importantly, it’s been 4 days since I celebrated the 39th anniversary of the day the world became a better place and it’s been a tough 4 days.  It didn’t start off so bad but thinking back on the 38th year which really wasn’t that great of a year and I realized that some of the things that made my 38th year crappy was preventable.  I am the fault of why I am sitting here at home and not out with friends, I am the reason why I am not happy with where I live.  Me, myself and my hormones(they are very much a player in all this-trust me).

Over an 8 month period I was on an emotional roller coaster with many loops. I finally found the brake and got off the crazy ride and have put both feet on solid ground and my eyes have finally focused on what’s really going on in my so called life.  This roller coaster was not a fun roller coaster it was draining, frustrating and terribly sad and it separated me from reality and those around me causing loss in my life. So now I am on solid ground and am standing here waiting for an adventure-a fun adventure but I don’t have many to share this fun adventure with seeing that I lost a lot over the year of my roller coaster incident.  What do I do? Do I go back and try to explain myself? Would anyone understand? Would they care?  Do I go out and find new ones to start new adventures with? Where? I feel I am at the gates of an amusement park waiting for it to open when everyone else is inside  and having a blast.

I have decided that now is the time-this is MY year. I am going to have a blast, enjoy the ride and not do it alone!  It’s all down hill from here so might as well have fun!!

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Sisterhood forever

When I went off to college I never thought of myself as the sorority “type”-I mean I’m not super girly and I never had a lot of “girl friend’s”. I was what we called a “tomboy”-my best friend was a boy which means we watched and played football, we played with hot wheels and Star Wars figures-basically all things not “girly”. So when I found myself going through what is called Rush in 1993 I kinda shocked not only my family but myself. Joining a sorority was a good thing for me-it helped me build relationships with women(which is very important in a woman’s life) and it helped me become a better woman(something I didn’t realize until recently)
During the college years it’s about sorority stuff and doing the college thing-as AOII’s it’s “sisterhood forever” and I was not thinking past the next frat party much less the next 10 years. Then I graduated, moved, got married, had a child and lots of stuff in between. During all these years a few of my sisters were in my daily life- they may not have been in the same city or heck even same state but they were there-a part of my life.
This past weekend(15 years later) we had a reunion. A group of us got together to hang out, catch up and just be together again. It was amazing-some of these women I haven’t seen in these past 15 years(thankfully we have sites life Facebook to reconnect and keep in touch). I had an “aha” moment this weekend-these women are my “sisters forever” -it’s not just a saying on a t-shirt. I am so thankful for the decision I made 18 years ago to become a part of AOII and have “sisterhood forever”. I look forward to more reunions and gatherings to keep the sisterhood alive. Hopefully one day Autumn will decide to get involved in the Greek system(AOII of course-but not mandatory) and have her own “sisters forever”

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Party of 3

Some decisions in life are easy such as what to wear, what to eat and what to do Friday night. Then there are the big decisions in life; where to work, who to marry and how many kids you are going to have in life. Well this past week I have made an important decision-I am only having one child. That’s right I’m calling it quits, hanging up my uterus, I’m done no more babies for me. It wasn’t the plan I had in my life but it is looking like my plan is not matching up with God’s plan. I have had 5 pregnancies and 1 child…you can do the math; that’s 4 losses. I am not embarrassed nor ashamed of my losses, it is a part of my life and I have nothing to hide. With that being said Autumn is truly my miracle child-an amazing one at that and I am more than blessed to be her mommy.So I only have one kid-I’m still a mom. So I don’t get to put 2,3 or 4 stick kids on the back of my SUV- I’m still a mom with an SUV full of kid junk. The hardest part I will admit is letting go..letting go of the “maybe one day” and the “someday.” Letting go of the clothes and the swings, the highchair, the shoes for the “maybe someday”. But I have to let go of the “maybe someday” and look in front of me at my “today”..my Autumn Faith. So now we move forward to the next adventures in our lives as a party of 3.